Gratitude is not meant to be seasonal and it seems that at this time of year gratitude gets a lot of attention. A common activity in elementary settings is to engage children in arts and crafts projects with Thanksgiving themes. I am remembering a project in which a child would use a crayon or a marker to trace their hand onto a piece of paper. On the thumb, the child would draw in the wattle, that bright red fold of skin hanging from the turkey’s throat. On the palm of the hand representing the body of the turkey, the child would be instructed to write “I am grateful for” and then finish the sentence on each of the five fingers representing the feathers that make up the tail. Can you count on your fingers five things you are grateful for?
I am grateful for my health including physical, mental and spiritual. My daily routines embrace a number of activities to best support my whole self. For physical well-being, I think most of us would agree that exercise is a good way to maintain good body health. Allow me to edit the adage “an apple a day keeps the doctor away” to read “a walk a day keeps the doctor away”. I have learned from the field of gerontology that one of the important keys to healthy aging is to keep moving. I am grateful to have a support system that encourages me to keep moving like my dog. The best part of my day is waking up and going for that first walk in the morning. This not only satisfies my physical health, but also my mental and spiritual well-being.
One way I support my mental health is to carry with me an “attitude of gratitude.” Positive psychology research shows a strong relationship between happiness and gratitude. Try an experiment – write down all the things that irritate you and notice how your mood changes. Then create a list of things you received or experienced that filled you with gratitude. Hold on to that second list! When we record pleasure, we experience positive emotions. Gratitude helps us focus on what we have, not what we are wishing for or missing in our lives. I am grateful for my positive emotions! They keep all the negative ones at bay.
Some researchers have suggested that using spiritual resources help to improve functioning, reduce isolation, and facilitate healing. Spirituality is known to be an important coping mechanism and provide individuals an important spirituality-health connection. My spiritual well-being is best supported by way of meditation both alone and with a group. Engaging in practices consistent with your beliefs (e.g., prayer, worship, ritual, reading spiritual books) encourages a sense of spiritual purpose and meaning along with hope and faith in something transcendent.
One of my favorite songs made famous by Barbra Streisand says it best: “people who need people are the luckiest people in the world.” I am grateful for all those individuals – my family, my friends, my neighbors, my teachers, my students, my clients, the hundreds of strangers that touch my life – those folks that help pack my groceries, serve me meals, prepare my beverages, help me board a plane, take care of my vehicle, others that are sharing an experience with me at the theater for a play or a movie or a book signing or a ballgame, the stranger on the elevator or passes me in the hall that shares an encouraging smile, a warm hello. Connecting with others is proven by research to improve mood and our overall health. I don’t need research to tell me that; I can feel it in my heart. Do you feel it too?
Sometimes we need a little help to cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Learn ways to let gratitude guide you throughout your day. Maya Angelou in her Celebrations collection writes, “Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer”. Morning and evening, this is a good time of year to get in the practice of showing appreciation and returning acts of kindness to feel connected, improve relations, and boost your mood and overall health.
Here are some suggestions to feel thankful:
1. Give Thanks. This might come in the form of writing a thank you note or saying thank you in the moment or even days later. If the opportunity has passed, a mental thank you or journaling your thanks works just as well. Giving thanks is not limited to thanking others; thanking yourself for accomplishing your own goals or for getting through the day is a positive form of self-care.
2. Creative Visualization. Find your happy place and whenever this world starts getting you down, envision your happy place. Shakti Gawain’s text and CD on Creative Visualization offers many strategies to transform and improve one’s outlook on life.
3. Meditate or Pause. Getting present and being in the moment helps us get grounded and set an intention of positivity. It allows us a moment to pause and regulate and gain clarity.
4. Empowering Affirmations have been known to change lives. There is a science that believes that we can create, we can manifest, all that we desire. Our thoughts are powerful. Gratitude affirmations remind us of all the times and ways things are okay. When things are not going my way, I think in my mind “life isn’t perfect and I am happy” and the tension seems to release because my focus has changed to what is most important for me, bringing joy. Gandhi is quoted as saying “be the change you want to see in the world”. What is your inner purpose? Make that your intention to support an attitude of gratitude.
5. Love Yourself. One way to define success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you go about doing you. Louise Hay’s mirror work or Sharon Saltzberg’s lovingkindness meditation are two approaches in learning to love yourself and see the world as being a safe place to express you. Say to yourself (in the mirror if you are willing) “you is kind, you is smart, you is important” (The Help, by Kahtryn Stockett). Repeat as often as needed.
6. Sensations. Use the 5 senses to notice what is around you that makes you feel grateful. I am imagining the Thanksgiving table; the beautiful centerpiece and candles to remind me of those not here with us; the “special” dishware; the care taken in setting the table so that each place setting says “I’m glad you are here”; the amazing smells of all the foods – the turkey, the pie – the clean house! The hugs and kisses as we greet at the door. The sounds of laughter and good cheer and all our glittery eyes as we look upon one another with gratitude, with the blessings of being together. What do you see, hear, feel, smell, taste, sense? May it bring you peace, joy, and contentment.
Take a minute to listen to our podcast for more thoughts on gratitude. The podcast link can be found on our website at RnRTherapyllc.com
We wish you and yours a Happy Thanksgiving and happy days always.